Well, it's 2010...and i'm hoping it will be a productive year. The last few years have been pretty crappy...and i'm beginning to think that i'm cursed. I had my lapband surgery in march of 07...and i've had nothing but horrible luck ever since. Between moving to Fl and not having the proper aftercare, to losing dad in 08, dealing with the resulting anxiety and depression, and then trying to quit smoking on top of it all, i have successfully gained back all the weight i managed to lose with the band. I DO have a new surgeon here now, finally, but a little too late it would seem, as now i dont seem to have much in the way of restriction even though my band is almost completely filled. Soooo...it's back to square one. which is scary as hell for me...not to mention a HUGE kick in the ass.
I just feel like a total failure.
I am an addict. I am addicted to soda and junk food. And by junk food i mean all food that is of no nutritional value whatsoever.
So i decided to start this blog to try and keep myself focused...to vent...to document...just a place for me, and possibly for people like me (if anyone ever decides to come here and read any of this). But i needed a place where i could be honest...a place where i could be real, and write about all the ugly stuff that goes along with being grossly overweight, being an addict, and trying to scratch my way out of this seemingly bottomless hole i've dug for myself.
So here goes...
~J
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